Nothing more, nothing less, love is the best
We are only a month away from Valentine’s day, a holiday I’ve never celebrated and this year I have the opportunity to, but that doesn’t mean I’m not going to have a galentines or palentines this year. While I’m might be all happily loved up, not all my friends are and I don’t want any of them to feel like crap on February 14th.
While there is no specific guidlines for rules to follow in a relationship, there are three key things I think you should always remember and embark on…for both the sake of your own happiness and just to make life a much more enjoyable ride. Sometimes things change though and the person we thought was ‘the one’ and your night in shining armor just ended up just being a twat in tinfoil (one of my favourite says). If you want to read my thoughts about Online Dating Replacing Traditional Dating or just have a laugh at my Tinder Date Tales I very much encourage you to do so.
01. DON’T NEGLECT YOUR FRIENDS
All to many times I’ve seen my friends get into relationships and suddenly don’t know how to reply to texts, or are constantly cancelling plans. Then when the worse happens and they fight or breakup with their partner they come running back, expecting nothing to have cha, ged. I’m sorry but you can’t just drop all your friends because you’re smitten for someone, your friends have been through a lot with you…plus who else are you going to rant to when you SO does something to annoy you, but it’s not annoying enough to bring it up to them?
In my last relationship, I dropped my friends quite a bit, although not necessarily because I wanted to…but I’m not going into detail about that. My best friends knew though, but didn’t know how to tell me because they didn’t want to hurt me…although once the relationship ended they were more than happy to be like I told you so, but only after the pain had healed and I was back to myself. Your friends know when someone’s not good for you don’t cut them out because they don’t like your SO, there’s a reason why they don’t. Remember that.
Sure friendships take more effort now were adult and don’t see each other for 8 hours a day at school, but that doesn’t mean we can’t spend time with our friends and our SO…heck you should be spending time with them both together. I mean I personally love seeing Sam interact with all of my friends and it makes me super happy that they all get along.
02. MAKE YOUR PARTNER FEEL WANTED
We’ve all seen those memes that are like “girl: do you love me? boy: of course I do, I married you” and your partner should never doubt that you want to be with them. After all, it’s nothing a simple conversation over a cup of tea can’t sort
or if you’re me a conversation while waiting for an uber to take us home after one too many drinks and over thinking. You don’t have to make massive romantic gestures or constantly telling your partner you love them, want to marry the etc to make them feel wanted. A simple good morning or good night text is a good place to start, or giving them a peck when they least expect it. For a majority of girls, it’s the little things that matter. I love when Sam rolls over and cuddles me in my sleep and that’s just one of the many things he does that makes me feel wanted and guess what…it doesn’t cost a penny.
03. FOLLOW YOUR GUT INSTINCT
If you’re second guessing a relationship, follow your gut. There’s a reason you get nervous (and not in a ‘butterflies in the stomach’ kind of way) everytime you see them, or why they don’t want to introduce you to any of their friends even though you’ve been together a while now. Chances are it’s not your fault either, it’s more likely you just aren’t compatible or one of you doesn’t see a future. If it’s the latter, it is better to quit while you’re ahead otherwise you could end up with a bigger mess that you don’t know how to deal with…and you’ll hurt the other person a hell of a lot more.
From experience I’ve learnt to follow my gut rather than waiting to see how something plays out, at least then I have control of my own destiny and love life…but this also counts for friendships. If you don’t think a friendship is working or it seems toxic to you then don’t be afraid to wave goodbye to that person and invest that time into building friendships with new people.
“The goal is to laugh forever with some you take seriously”
What would you say is the most important thing to remember when you’re in a relationship?
Love you lots like jelly tots x
All photos within this post were taken by my myself on my Olympus Pen E-PL7 in natural lighting. They were then edited on Photoshop CC 2015 and VSCO.